A Rough Start
January 16, 2026 began like most weekdays—school runs, routine movement, and the quiet pressure of getting everyone where they needed to be. Eve was still over from the night before, and between the unresolved frustration from the previous day and a full night without sleep, I woke up already carrying too much.
I wasn't calm. I wasn't patient. And I could feel it in my body before I fully acknowledged it in my mind.
Energy With Nowhere to Go
That frustration came out as noise and motion—slamming things around, throwing a remote that wasn't working, moving too fast through the house. It wasn't about anger at anyone in particular. It was exhaustion looking for an outlet.
So I cleaned.
Not calmly. Not methodically. But thoroughly.
What started as restless movement turned into progress. My bedroom, still a mess from the last time Eve's girls stayed over, was finally mostly put back together by the time I stopped. Sometimes motion is the only way I know how to process what I can't yet articulate.
Eve noticed. She offered affection—not as a fix, but as acknowledgment. That mattered more than I expected.
Back to Routine
Afterward, I took Eve home and then moved back into the rhythm of the day—picking up the kids from school, then later picking up Kayla from work. The structure helped. Familiar tasks always do.
Evening Connection
Later that evening, I went back to Eve's house and spent a good portion of time there. The day before, I had asked The Sister if she could from my Associate's Degree, and she did a great job with it. Seeing it framed felt like a small but meaningful validation—something tangible representing effort that often feels invisible.
I also brouh over Isabella's school photos so Eve and her mom could help pick out a few. It felt normal. Domestic. Shared.
A Gentle Ending
I planned to lay down with Eve until she fell asleep—nothing more. There were supposed to be boundaries in place, but like many thngs in this season of life, plans and reality didn't quite match.
Once Eve was asleep, I went home.
What I'm Noticing
Today reminded me how closely exhaustion and frustration are linked—and how easily unprocessed feelings can turn into motion instead of words. I don't love how the day started, but I recognize why it did.
Cleaning helped. Connection helped more.
I'm still learning how to slow my reactions without silencing what I'm feeling—and how to let rest arrive before frustration has to force its way out.