Chapter · Reflective

Why I Chose to Write Instead of Chasing a "Real Job"

A decision shaped by skills, responsibility, and the cost of being present

Summary
This wasn't a rejection of work. It was a reckoning with reality—what work costs, what it pays, and what it quietly takes away.
By A Work in Progress
Jan 3, 2026

This Was Never About Avoiding Work

Choosing to write wasn't a rejection of responsibility.
It was the opposite.

For years, I did what you're supposed to do:

  • I learned
  • I built
  • I accumulated skills
  • I kept trying

Game development.
Web development.
Design systems.
Databases.
Frameworks.
Long nights spent learning things most people never see.

There was effort.
There was discipline.
There just wasn't stability.

Skills Don't Always Translate to Security

I acquired a massive amount of technical skill with very little to show for it financially.

Not because I didn't work hard.
Not because I lacked ability.

But because:

  • Opportunity didn't align with circumstance
  • Remote work rarely accounts for parenting reality
  • Entry-level pay rarely respects senior-level responsibility

And most importantly—
because every "real job" came with hidden costs no one talks about.

The Babysitting Equation No One Likes to Do

A traditional job sounds simple until you calculate childcare.

Babysitting costs would:

  • Consume most of the paycheck
  • Require longer hours just to break even
  • Pull me further away from my children—not closer to stability

Work would increase.
Presence would decrease.
Stress would multiply.

That's not progress.
That's erosion.

Presence Is a Cost Too

Being present with children isn't free.

It costs:

  • Career momentum
  • Traditional optics
  • External validation

But absence costs more.

It costs connection.
It costs awareness.
It costs the chance to notice who your children are becoming in real time.

I wasn't willing to pay that price quietly.

Writing Became the Most Honest Work Available

Writing doesn't pretend to be easy.
It doesn't guarantee income.
It doesn't impress resumes.

But it allows me to:

  • Stay present
  • Work around real life
  • Build something slowly without sacrificing my children in the process

Support exists here not because writing is noble—but because it's responsible given the reality.

This Is Not a Shortcut

There's nothing easy about this choice.

There's uncertainty.
There's vulnerability.
There's explaining yourself more than you should have to.

But there's also integrity.

Support helps make this choice survivable—not glamorous, not comfortable, just possible.

Why Support Matters in This Context

Support doesn't replace effort.
It doesn't erase responsibility.

It helps offset the gap between:

  • What work pays
  • What parenting costs
  • What presence requires

It allows this story to continue without pretending the math doesn't matter.

Thank You for Understanding the Reality

If you support this work, you're not endorsing avoidance.

You're acknowledging:

  • The cost of childcare
  • The value of presence
  • The reality that "real work" doesn't look the same for everyone

And that understanding—quiet, honest, and grounded—means more than you know.

Support this story

Buy Me Peace & Quiet

Writing these chapters takes stillness and a quiet place to think. If this chapter resonated with you, you can help create a little more peace and quiet — the kind that lets the next chapter exist.

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More on how support helps:

Tags

#fatherhood #responsibility #unfinished story

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